Why I don't think your 18month old is bad.

Here's the thing. My son loves to pull cords out of sockets, wrap them behind his head. He insists that all of his books and toys need to be out and scattered around the living room so that he can see them all while he is awake. He climbs on everything and nothing is off limits or out of reach. He will find a way to get what he wants!

The most amazing part... He is exactly who he is supposed to be! My son is so smart! He's determined, loving, loud and perfect. 

It drives me crazy when my friends tell me how bad their 1yr old is. THEY ARE NOT! These babies are learning! I'm not saying its easy to chase around a toddler who insists on grabbing everything but he's LEARNING! My son does do things he's not supposed to and I tell him no, there are times he still does it. It's called testing boundaries. Just because mommy said no doesn't mean he doesn't want to still do it. 

Moms(and dads) stop trying to make your kids into Sloth's who just sit in front if the tv and do nothing all day! We live in a society where my generation and younger are lazy entitled know it alls... Want to know a reason why.. We TEACH them to be that way!! If you sit there and be good you can have this game and that, I'll make your food for you so you don't make a mess, here eat it quietly in front of the tv so you don't get in my way. Oh no you're throwing a fit fine watch your show mommy can't concentrate on hers anyways. This is not ok! 

We need to let our babies learn and explore! Be creative! At 10 months my son pushed his bumbo up to the buffet in my living room and stood on the arm of it so he could reach something I'd put out of the way! Was I mad? Absolutely not i was amazed that at such a young age he had the initiative to do that! 

I call my son monster. Not because he terrorizes my house and I'm at my wits end, but because he growls and laughs, he gets into things he shouldn't but cuddles and smiles. I don't mean it in a negative way it is one of his thousands of nickname. I won't call him "bad" for doing exactly what he should be doing at his age. 

I would take my rambunctious, curious, messy boy over a sit on my bum all the time boy any day. He is perfect and exactly right...

 I just wish more moms would feel that way. We need to be more encouraging. This is our future and theirs so its important we teach them the right things ❤ 

How I got sucked into cloth diapers and why I love them now

So one of my best friends has a daughter 3 months older than my little man. We are both pregnant and again she is due 3 months before I am! 

She made the decision to switch to cloth diapers. I have a lot of respect for cloth diapering moms. It's better for the environment and all that other stuff but I couldn't get past the swishing in the toilet, constant laundry, pins and all of that folding! It was not something I could bring myself to do. I thought about it for about 2 min when I was pregnant the first time and dismissed the idea. 

Well my cloth diapering BFF decided that for her baby shower she would request that since they can be so expensive and her little izzy is still wearing diapers so she needed enough for two she would request some for her baby shower an posted some websites.

I didn't think to much of it and ignore the websites for a while. Well then she posted a picture of her cute little Isabella in one of her new cloth diapers and it was one of the cutest little things I've ever seen!! Who knew?! Surly not me. It made me very curious so I decide to finally take a peek at the websites shed posted... 

Oh my goodness! They were so cute! Little Dino diapers and jungle animals. Solids and prints! I immediately wanted them for my little man! I could just picture them on his little bum. Yep... My immediate wanting to switch was 100% the way they looked. 

However I am much smarter than to spend money on something because of how it looks. I still remembered my initial no pins, folding, swishing dilemma.

Here is the best news if you are anything like me... Cloth diapers have EVOLVED! There are many different kinds but the ones I use now are the one size pocket diapers with the microfiber bamboo liners. Ah-mazing! These diapers are one piece and snap together! There are different snaps along the front so you can adjust leg width and tummy size at the time you are putting the diaper on! They have little pockets in the top and you just stick your insert in and put it on your tiny bum! So simple! For the moms that done like swishing(gross!) they sell disposable liners! These are essentially long pieces of toilet paper, but thicker, that you line the diaper with right before you put it on. When you change you baby the liner goes strait in the toilet and flushed away! These are not your moms cloth diapers! 

I bought 1 days worth to start out just to make sure I liked them before I invested a bunch of money into something I wasn't going to use. First thing I learned us that little boys tend to pee more. We found my son was leaking through. Discouraged I did some online investigation... Turns out I can just double up my inserts! Actually you can go up to 3 inserts/ diaper but we haven't found that necessary yet. Because I only had 1 days worth I was washing diapers every night... Turns out.. I didn't mind at all. I throw diapers in as soon as i put my son to bed. I flip them over and make sure to restart the dryer before bed. It is nothing out of my day. 

Next issue... Folding... What folding... It takes about 5 minutes to stuff 10 diapers and be ready to go! Even my husband who never folds laundry ever doesn't mind. It truly is not a sacrifice at all! 

I am hooked on cloth diapers and wish everyone would give them a try. I know they aren't for all but believe me when I say they are not nearly as bad and scary as most of us think.

My unsexy way of conceiving baby number two!

Was your TTC period romantic? We're you able to make it special? Was it planned or did your little miracle surprise you?

If you've read any of my previous posts you will know that my first pregnancy was 2 years in the making. After that long it was still intimate . We did have days where because of hormones and scheduled sex it seems kind of routine by we would joke and make it playful. It's very hard but important to keep it light. If you have issues TTC the best thing you can do for yourself and your partner is try and relax.

On this same note I'd like to tell you how less sexy my second pregnancy came about. 

My husband and I after quite a few discussions decided we wanted another baby. My son was 10 months at the time and we agreed that we wanted me to be able to get maternity leave again. To do that I would need to wait until I went back to work before we could start trying.

I was so excited and booked an appointment with my OB/GYN. Because of my past fertility issues I wanted to be ready for when the time came for us to get working on our newest addition! My doctor however informed me that child birth can often put your body to normal even if it wasn't before! He said that my husband and I would need to TTC for 6 months before he would look at prescribing me fertility treatments. I was both saddened and saw a little glimmer of hope that maybe just maybe I could do this on my own! 

I EBF my son for 6.5 months and then pumped for an additional 2 weeks so my first period didnt show up until shortly before my visit with my doctor. This made me scared that I might not succeed but I felt determined to try. 

By the time I went back to work I ha only had 2 periods. I noticed though that they were about every 6 weeks apart! This is a huge improvement from unpredictable 9-12 pre pregnancy. I had no guarantee they would continue on this routine but I hoped. 

Now if you have every used fertility drugs to try an conceive you were likely told to every other day baby dance from day 12-18 to ensure you had swimmers in there at time of ovulation. Well because I wasn't sure when I would finally ovate we couldn't plan that way. But we decided well if we don't know the week we would be intimate every other night until we got a BFP!!!

As someone who very much enjoys sex with my husband on a very regular basis this thought seemed amazing! 

Here is where it gets completely unromantic... My husband was working a night shift. He started work at 4pm and ended work at 2am, home by 3am.  I work days. I was up at 5am to get myself and our son ready, took him to daycare, started for at 8am was off at 4:30pm home by 6(long commute). I had just enough time to feed my son and bath him before bed with about 20 min of mommy baby time. This was exhausting. See the problem was our conflicting schedules. If you review the above you will note the only time we were both at home was from 3am-6am. The first week this was not a problem. Our every thee night rendezvous was hot! By week two it was still fun but this working mama was getting TIRED. By week 3... Ok I'm not proud but I'm pretty sure one night while half asleep I said just get in done and go shower! LOL we were still able to have sexy nights on the weekends but the weekdays were just as quick as possible so I could go back to sleep before work.

I love my husband and still don't mind being woken up for sex but every other night turned out to be way to much for me.... However... IT WORKED!!! 

After 2.5 months of trying to conceive we did! I was exhausted. It wasn't unenjoyable but i felt like I worked almost as hard in that time as I did the whole two years the first time.

I don't regret a single moment and I recommend it as a way to get pregnant! Just try as we did on the weekends to make sure that you keep some intimacy in your baby making. It's important. After your babies are grown up your partner is who you have left. Don't ever forget to make them feel important for more than just half of the chemistry in your tiny love.

 

Babies with chest coughs

Last night my LO, who is only 11months, had a terrible cough that would not let him sleep. He has been a little congested for two days but at about midnight last night he was coughing so much he couldn't sleep at all. I tried everything I knew. I had his humidifier going, we use natural Japanese mint oil instead of Vic's, I was giving him water which he was drinking. But within 20 minutes of laying him down he was coughing again. By 330am I was desperate to help but didn't know how. Also being exhausted wasn't letting me think. Finally after searching the web(thank goodness for the Internet!) I came across another blog! The tips that seemed to be the sweet spot to help my son was putting a pillow under one end of the mattress to elevate it slightly, and putting some of the mint oil on his feet and then putting some socks on. He was out by 4am and slept until 9am! Not as much sleep as he would have gotten cough free since he was up for 4hours in the middle of the night but hopefully these tips continue to help!


For the whole blog post to see if it can help you see here:
http://themamadramalogues.blogspot.ca/2009/08/what-to-do-when-baby-has-chesty-cough.html?m=1

PLAY WITH YOUR KIDS!!

So I have a confession. For no particular reason my neighbor creeps me out. He's never done or said anything to me. Maybe it's the way he looks or his over all demeanor but I have always just always felt uncomfortable whenever I see him.

Until today. Today my son is 10 months old. Every month on the 13th I take a picture of him with a part hat on saying is month age. I am framing these pictures and watching him grow. This morning I woke up and after my son was dressed went to take his "month day" picture. But I realized I had no party hats. 20minutes ago I ran out to get party hats and 5 minutes ago my outlook on my neighbor changed. I got home and he was kicking a ball with his son. Seems so simple right?! But with that one act I realized how absurd I've been.

He's a good dad. I didnt know anything about him and I didn't like like. Now I know one small fact and that's changed.

My point however is not that of your a good parent I'll like you. My point is about why that makes him a good dad. He's playing soccer on his lawn with his son. He is taking time out of his every day busy schedule he may or may not have and dedication time to give his son attention.

Now I don't know about you but I grew up with a lot of bad kids and boys and I can't picture any of their dads if they are even in the picture kicking a ball around with them.

IT MATTERS what we do and do not do with our children. We only have kids for a short amount of time. In that short period we need to help build them into respectable human beings and adults.

Interacting with your kids makes a difference. It shows them they are important. It opens up the lines of communication so your babies can feel they can talk to you about good and bad things happening in their life.

If more dads gave their kids the attention they deserve maybe there wouldn't be so many people dying in drug and gang crap before they get a chance to realize the mistakes they are making.

This goes for the mommy's out there too. You are just as important. Treasure your kids because they won't be kids forever and we need to start being accountable for how they are raised.

Another side benefit... IT'S FUN!!! how much of a stress reliever is it to make a kid laugh and smile! Is there anything better than the look of pure joy on your baby's face?! Personally I don't think so!

So MAKE the time and play with your kids ❤

-L

My 2 month old has a bedtime

I have been blessed with a very easy to handle baby. I know that I'm lucky because he doesn't cry often. When he does he has a reason(wet,hungry,tired). However I strongly believe part of my success has been about developing a routine.

I'm not saying schedule your baby around the clock. That's absurd and completely unrealistic. However some routine will greatly help you and your baby out. The first month I wouldn't suggest even trying. You are their b**** and they know it. The trick is to slowly take some of the control back without them noticing. With my son it was bedtime.

I am nursing and I was exhausted. He would sleep 3-4hrs at a time from midnight-noon. This meant zero time for my husband much less myself.

Bedtime was a little hard establish so young, but I started making our bed time routine start at 7pm. We would bath if it was bath night, change him, lotion him, get him in a sleeper and start feeding him.

I make sure to feed min 15 min if he falls asleep I'll burp him and switch sides trying to get a min 30mim feed in. Once he falls asleep the second time id put him in his crib and stay in the room until he slept.

I have a dimmer light in his room so i wont kill myself when hes waking up or blinding him in the middle of the night. This helped so much! No matter how much he cried or fussed the light never turned up and we never left the room so he learned that when the lights are dark that means its sleep time. It worked for us. It took a while though. I remember one day during the first two weeks he was up until 10pm! Gah I was soooooooo tired but I didn't give in and now every night he has the same bed time.

Trust me I know how hard this can be to maintain but so important. If I'm out visiting I need to leave by 6pm to make sure he's home in time and not sleeping in the car to come home and immediately start bed time. The twice I messed with the routine not getting home and starting bedtime until 8-830 was enough to not do it again. It took DAYS to get him back on schedule. . The second time it took almost a week!

The benefits FAR outweigh the hassles . First off bedtimes give you time for yourself! You can read or just relax or spend some quality time with your partner :). It also gives you more stability with your day. Same bed time leads to approximate same time getting up! I get more sleep, my son gets more sleep and I feel less stresses during the day.

You can plan to do things without being worried of you'll still be sleeping. My son also started sleeping longer. Part of that was age but part of it I feel was because he knew it was bed time. :)

Another benefit I find is I will be going back to work for a bit after my year of maternity is up. Having an early bedtime now means when the time comes I won't have to change his routine because he is already on the one that will need to continue for once we have to get up for daycare and work.

A few of my mommy friends tried it after hearing about how successful it was for us and can't believe they didn't do it sooner.

All babies/parents routines and needs are different so find what works for you but I highly recommend trying a set bedtime. :)

My Term Pregnancy

So we left off with me just having a miscarriage after two years, surgery, and fertility drugs.


(tmi time)I dont know how many of you know this but when a woman ovulates she will have a thicker almost slimy discharge. Well I do know this so, two weeks after I miscarried I ovulated. I discussed with my fiancé and we decided to start trying again then instead of waiting the additional 4 weeks. If the doctor said I'd be physically ready then I needed to know that hadn't been my only shot at being a mommy. I felt scared and desperate that it would never happen. To be clear to this day I will grieve the loss of my very first baby, but I couldn't give up on being a mommy. 

Two and a half weeks later I found out we were pregnant again! I didn't tell a single person. I was so scared after last time that I kept my little secret. I was getting married two weeks later and I just wanted to focus on that and keep my baby safe. A few days after I found out I was pregnant I started to spot. I was terrified it was happening again. We went to the doctor and had an ultrasound done. Thankfully everything was fine. First trimester bleeding is semi normal and often harmless.

Because of the bleeding, I relaxed, did almost nothing except work and finish wedding details. Between weeks 4-9 of my pregnancy I had 4 ultrasounds done due to bleeding the doctor wanting to keep checking the baby. I had blood work done every 3 days to monitor my HCG levels. Finally at exactly 12 weeks I stopped bleeding and told everyone I was pregnant.

Now I had been through a lot more than most to get where I was and I wasn't taking anything for granted. I was/am so thankful for what I've been given. I tried very hard my whole pregnancy not to complain about anything because it all meant I had a little miracle growing inside me.... Then the itching started.

At around 25-26 weeks I began getting REALLY itchy. It started with my belly, so I thought ok it's just growing. Cream seemed to help a bit so if i got itchy I would just go to the bathroom at work or home and lotion my belly up. Then it moved to my arms and legs and worst if all my feet. I found myself constantly scratching! Some times I would scratch my legs so bad they would bleed a bit! When I say I tried not to complain I mean I REALLY tried not to complain but this itching was driving me crazy! I felt like I was being tortured. It was so bad some nights I couldn't sleep until my husband coated my entire body in extra strength gold bond medicated cream. But if I didn't fall asleep before the burning wore off we had to do it all over again. I had seen my doctor around 25 weeks and not said anything when it was just my tummy. I talked to my friends and family and they said that it was normal and I'd just have to live with it. I didn't believe they understood how bad it was! Finally by my next appointment at 29weeks I couldn't take it anymore! I told my doctor. (****Note to anyone pregnant, if it doesn't seem right don't listen to your friends, TELL YOUR DOCTOR, if they blow it off but you still don't feel right TELL THEM AGAIN! You know your body best!**) Thankfully my doctor listened the first time, he gave me a form for blood work and told me I do it on my way home. This was a Wednesday and he said it would take a few days to get the results. Thursday afternoon I was called at work by the office and told I needed to go to the hospital for more tests as some if my enzyme levels were not looking good. I was admitted into he hospital and monitored for 3 days. I was diagnosed with cholestasis. This is a condition that causes your liver enzymes to increase. If, with medication, they can't get your enzymes under control, your health is at risk and they may need to deliver your baby immediately. I was 30 weeks pregnant. My doctor informed me that I would probably have to deliver my baby between 34-36 weeks. This condition normally doesn't show up until around 36 weeks so when they have to do an early delivery you are already considered almost full term.

At the time I was told I would be delivering by 36 weeks at the latest but if they couldn't get my liver enzymes down hey would have to induce me immediately. While in the hospital I was given two steroid shots to help develop my son's lungs incase early arrival was my only option. They also started me on medication to try and get me better. Here is something I didn't mention, cholestasis is vey rare, it affects less than 1% of pregnant Canadians. So in the hospital I was an oddity. I was talked about because I had something they didn't see every day. I didnt mind though because it meant they were watching me and my baby closely as its something they didn't usually deal with so took no chances.

The medication worked! I was allowed I go home but was put on bed rest. We didn't know when I would have to deliver my baby but my liver enzymes dropping meant I could carry him longer and longer. I was going for blood work daily at first and by the end weekly.

At 35 weeks my enzymes were at a safe level and I was 1-2cm dilated on my own so my doctor said not to worry I would probably go into labor myself without being induced! I was so excited as I had been planning to have my baby by 36 weeks since I'd been in the hospital. The following week my baby still wasn't here so I thought ok I'm 36 weeks now they have to induce me! I was so excited to meet my baby and finally have him out where it seemed to be safer than inside. However my exam showed I was 2-3cm now so any day my doctor said. He was leaving on holidays in 3 days so I did everything I could find to get my baby out(except castor oil). Still nothing! My 37 week appointment I was 37w 5d so I was anxious.

At 38wks 4days I was full of so many emotions. I was nervous for my baby's health. I was excited I would soon get to hold him. I was frustrated because, thinking I was delivering at 36 weeks made me feel almost 3 weeks over due. My doctors replacement decided because of my anxiety he would do a membrane sweep. Just an FYI to anyone considering it, some women swear by this but know that it HURTS! Also in my case it didn't work My baby was supposed to be here already! My husband decided to go for a walk that night to try and coax our son out. OH MY GOODNESS! After about 10 blocks I got the worst stomach cramp I couldn't walk any further! It hurt so bad! My husband had to go home and get the car and even though I knew it wasn't labor we went to the hospital to get checked out.

Well at the hospital they were a little concerned I hadn't been booked in for an induction yet but did a no stress test and at 1am Friday they let me go home but asked that I come back Saturday for another no stress test. Saturday I was 38 weeks 6 days. Everything looked fine but the doctor on call said cholestasis made her nervous so she said they were going to induce me! FINALLY! Thank goodness I kept my baby bag in my car! I was soooo happy! They started the drugs to induce labor at 1045am and at 4:10 the next morning my son was finally here!

My little miracle rainbow baby had finally arrived. He was healthy beautiful and 7lb5oz of perfection. 

He latched in the delivery room and I was able to breast fees right away. I know with everything I went through I'm lucky. I feel blessed every day to have my miracle. Him and his daddy mean the world to me. I wish that everyone could experience the kind of love I feel for my family. 

I didn't have the easiest pregnancy, but it was easier than a lot of other people have it. Remember that pregnancy is only 9 months if your lucky. Enjoy the sleepless nights and the kicks because you miss it when its gone. ❤

For every mommy who complains about her pregnancy marks and discomfort there is another wishing she could experience it. 

-Linda